Home. There's no place like it.

Tonight, as I sit in one of my favorite little eateries with one of my favorite peoples, I can feel nostalgia cover me like a cozy blanket. After months in a foreign (to me) city, it is a true delight to feel the familiar everywhere. The smells, the sounds, to laugh so hard it hurts(another favorite). Being back in the town I should call home (and will once again in upcoming months) beckons an array of emotions.
I guess after several years of being somewhat of a vagrant, my idea of home is somewhat distorted. Of course, I have a family I adore and friends that you cannot replace, but that did not stop me from running off to a city that I felt mirrored the size of my ideas. (At least this is what I told myself.)
Most people don't like change. I thrive on it. The rush of the new, the beginnings, the possibilities send my serotonin soaring. Also, probably why I start much more than I finish. So, you can see why moving across the country would appeal to one like me.
Well, imagine my disappointment when things did not exactly pan out. We will skip the messy details for now, but all that could be wrong with my scenario, was. I can totally admit when I am wrong, but I cannot deny that the I-told-ya-so's don't sting the ego a bit and words like "failure" and "big fat loser" may have popped in my head a time or two when the decision to move back was made.
SO, I woke up in my former home feeling absolutely homeless this morning. Yeah, I said I like beginnings, but beginning again's...different story. But my pensive and very wistful morning began to change. You know when something shifts so gradually that you can't tell its moving until you leave and come back and see it is in a totally different place than the one you left it in? That is how my day went. I have to admit that I have never subscribed to the whole "meant-to-be" idealism. I feel like more often than not, it is used as a justification tactic. Nonetheless, you can only write things off as coincidences so many times.
And just like that, "coincidence" after "coincidence", my perspective began to change. Maybe moving back isn't necessarily moving backwards but possibly the path to moving forward.
I love the dictionary. It has a way of simplifying words to their basic forms, words we pollute with our own meanings. Home: a dwelling place or retreat; any place of residence or refuge. Those are my two favorites. ;)